Friday, 1 October 2010


I have a huge backlog of musings and observations of curio's and the queer, but no time to write any of it down. Putting virtual pen to virtual paper at the moment is a real treat, however I must get back to work pretty sharpish.

These subjects must be put on hold:-
  • A quest for the ultimate custard tart. It's a sort of suburban version of the Quest for the Holy Grail but without knights, magic, swords, chivalry or a chalice.
  • Woolwich Photographic Society and their impact on the Magnum Group
  • My concept for a Plumsteadshire Modern Art Museum. You'll like the next bit - 'Tate Common'. I have an amazing concept design which will be revealed in due course.
  • My concept for a Plumsteadshire Film Club. You'll like the next bit - 'Splice Island'.
  • The best days out for children. All tried and tested by my team of experts.
Having spoken to some lovely listeners, it seems they really want to know more about my so-called neighbours known as The Shameless, the great unwashed, dole scum, soap dodgers, spongers, work-shy etcetera depending on how far they¹ are testing my patience.

This week, I've had to go and ask them to turn down their horrible boom boom music twice. Over the two years they've infested this area, I've probably knocked on their door over thirty times. I've been very close to putting an official complaint to the housing association, but I don't think it fair for them to be uprooted and moved into a faceless council estate where their children might just plummet into a chasm of no hope. Having said that, living here, they just stick out like a maggot ridden bubonic sore thumb. I know it's not exactly Hampstead Garden Suburb here, but they really are a Victorian freak show.

Actually, I have a question. Is there some modern day tribal code that dictates males of the chav genus must only wear underpants when at home²? Similarly, all windows must be kept wide open at all times? When I popped round yesterday, one mutant answered the door in his pants. Maybe it was quite warm? But I remembered whenever I popped round in deepest sub zero last Winter, they were 'dressed' as if they were holidaying in the Seychelles.

1 - they, meaning the so-called neighbours, not my lovely listeners
2 - this is a genuine question that I need feedback on


Anonymous said...

You have to report these people. You and your family have a right to a certain standard of living and clearly they are impacting this. Think about it, you have had to knock and complain over 30 times!!!! Not acceptable.

Anonymous said...

I love the sign I keep seeing on the tube at the moment, something like "the poorer the household the bigger the flatscreen". It's the Spectator ad..
Bet your neighbours have a 42incher....

Doctor Pangloss said...

I don't know if there's a sociological study into chav culture (an oxymoron if ever there were one), but I've wondered why it is that the chavvier the person is, the louder¹ they are. The volume of my neighbour's televisions being a case in point. I think they had six televisions at one point; the one in their living room was actually the width of their window!! That is no mean feat. Surely that is a 60" flat screen?!*!?

I don't begrudge them being TV addicts, but I don't want my hard earned taxes to pay for their hobbies, and I don't want their noise invading my sleep.

I've not seen the Spectator advert², but it would definitely make me laugh.

1 - physically and audibly
2 - I would add Sky TV satellite dishes into the equation. Council estates seem to breed satellite dishes. Given that this is housing for those in most need, I don't know how they afford it.

Plumstead Integration Project said...

4th Dec 100 Launch of the Festival Activities 5pm-9pm

St Patrick School Hall

A screening of the film by Jill Daniels, “Small Town Girl”, followed by a hands-on workshop on the film production,
presentation of the camera equipment
community discussion on the subsequent events.
Introducing the material about the festival, the programme, and submissions regulations.

10th December networking, live band O’Dowds Pub, Plumstead High Street. 7pm-midnight

15th January , 5pm-8pm

Screening of the film(s) from the local artists and from the guests.

Hands-on workshop with a film professional: Editing and camera work. How to produce narrative.

29th January 5pm-8pm

Screening of the film(s) from the students.

Hands-on workshop with a film professional: sound and light. How to build characters.

12th February, 5pm-8pm

Screening of the mobile phone films presented by the invited filmmaker.

Hands-on workshop with a film professional: the difference between a short film and a mobile phone film. Practical difficulties, quality, purpose. How to capture reality in 5 minutes. Theme selection. Editing software.

26th February 5pm-8pm.

Screening of a short fiction and a short documentary film chosen by the invited filmmaker.

Workshop on using different cameras: from the simplest consumer video camera to Sony HD. The importance of idea. How to articulate the idea in a fictional and documentary way. Differences and purposes. How to disseminate and promote a film and a filmmaker?

5th March 2011 networking live band O’Dowds Pub Plumstead High Street 7pm-midnight

From 20th January to 5th March PIP will be receiving films submitted by the local residents and by other producers who have responded to our Internet campaign.

From 5th March to 10th March the judges will be watching them for assessment. They will choose the best films in three categories:

Mobile phone max 5 mins

Fiction max 20 mins

Documentary max 20 mins

19th March and 20th March 2011 St Patrick School Hall

Day 1: 11am – 8pm

Screenings of shortlisted films. Discussion. Networking. Invited filmmakers available for advice.

Day 2: 3pm – 9pm

screenings of the winning films and a gala ceremony. Certificates, awards and diplomas. Local authorities, schools, associations, and potential sponsors of future events will be invited.

Plumstead Integration Project said...

Hi, I have just sent you our provisional programme for the Plumstead Film Festival, I thought that it may interest you, perhaps you would like to join the organisation process?
I know that you have been thinking about the film club, this is what PIP would like to see in Plumstead too. How about joining powers?
All the best,

PlumBun said...

Hijacking the PIP post here. I have just had a look at your website but you can't actually access any information without signing up. I dont in theory have any problems with giving my email address to people but I can't actually see if it is something that I would want to sign up to or receive further information on. Cant you have some information available for the good folk of Plumstead?

Dr P. I think your neighbours might be related to the people that live over the road from us.