Monday, 31 October 2005

Halloween Hell

Bracing myself tonight for the annual Festival of Legalised Extortion. Children walking from house to house asking for any treats. TREATS, as long as it's cash. We've all been there.
I don't do tricks, not unless it involves a person with a wand and lifetime membership of the Magic Circle and these little brats sure as hell don't have either. But they've got tricks alright, ones involving eggs and very little sleight of hand.
I wonder what kind of response I'd get if I asked them the derivation of Halloween? I'd reckon that would be a fast-track ticket to their treat.

Thursday, 27 October 2005

nice cup of tea in Plumstead

I've lived in this area for about 4 years now and had discovered the café at the top of Shooter's Hill almost on day one, and a jolly good spot it is too. It's particularly good if you like dogs. Not that they serve tea to dogs (that I know of), but dog walkers seem to congregate there on a Sunday morning. You can have a hearty fry-up (or other foodstuffs which your heart will thank you for), and a mug of tea whilst taking in the view Sidcup. Can life get better than this?

Yes it can. It could stay open a little longer. This place has the location but the interior decor of a greasy spoon.

Having walked everywhere in Hong Kong, I thought I'd go for a walk locally. I'll cut out the mundane part.... I ended up in Charlton House. Nice building, nice cup of tea and a delicious scone with a patty of butter and mini jam; not in Cornwall, so no clotted cream. However, could do with a range of pastries.

Maybe Bettys of Yorkshire could run a nice tea shop at the pub formerly known as The Ship on Plumstead Common. Now could life get better than THAT?

Friday, 21 October 2005

Thursday, 20 October 2005

The green green grass of home

Today, I saw the most peculiar thing.
A whole back garden laid in ASTROTURF!!!! I kid you not.
Calm down folks, this is not a hoax.
The whole garden was laid with the stuff of goalkeeper's nightmares.
Maybe the home owner was being ironic, or controversial in a conceptual artist kind of way. Somehow, I doubt it.

There And Back Again

"There And Back Again"
Thinking back to the Lord Of The Rings films, I think this is what Frodo's dad entitles his autobiography.
In this context, I've been away and unable to report back to Plumsteadshire, hence millions of disappointed fans around the globe have been sobbing into their handkerchiefs and musing over whether life is worth living anymore.
I know the feeling too. I only have to think back a few months when local hero and star of Daz ads, Danny Baker had decided to shut up shop on his brilliant morning show for BBC Radio London. It was simply the best shot in the arm to start the day. I couldn't imagine mornings without the Candyman, then suddenly he'd gone.
So I've spent a couple of weeks in Hong Kong, recharging my batteries. Oddly, I didn't miss checking my email, but I did miss using the internet. It's so ingrained into my daily life, reading the news, finding addresses, checking train times, looking for any possible piece of information, writing Plumsteadshire. I was very surprised that I couldn't find an internet café anywhere and Hong Kong isn't exactly behind the times when it comes to technology. Well, when I found internet access, I was stumped anyway; using Internet Explorer in Chinese was too much like putting together a 100 piece jigsaw puzzle with a blindfold on.
I had such a great holiday that I knew when I'd come back to London, I'd fall back to earth with a huge thump. Part holidayitus gloom, part knowing how Britain can be better if it tried gloom, then it's as if guardian angels really exist, I discover that Danny Baker has returned to the London airwaves.

Who can take a sunrise
Sprinkle it with dew?
Cover it in chocolate
and a miracle or two
The candyman
The candyman can.